Jailhouse Humor Aficionado Gifts

"Sorry I'm late, I had to do jail time."

'Let's get a kitty.'

Prisoner Crossing

'No need to come in.. you can fax me your resume.'

"I had money problems- forged fivers the wrong colour!"

"How'd you know I was in for cyber crime?"

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

Conrad Black will be unable to do his investment club's tax returns this year.

'I was on 'AMERICA'S MOST WANTED', captured on 'COPS', tried on 'COURT TV' and sentenced to 10 years of basic cable.'

'I'm here for jumping my bond... Bail bond.'

Man in arrow suit - 'I'm in for white collar crime.'

'Well, you're not acting like you have every confidence in me.'

"Murder one. How about you?" "I tried to rob an arts and crafts store with a hot glue gun."

'The Not so Great Escape.'

Prison baseball game features Bankers vs. Wall Street.

"They weren't very friendly when they proscuted me for obtaining loans under false names."

'My first counterfeit dollar.'

'It's for you.'

'True, you've been assigned a nobody lawyer but you're a nobody criminal!'

Cartoonist draws bomb next to prisoner.

At least you have security!

'The SEC got me for inflating the numbers..'

"They want to spend the weekend at Daddy's" (Colour)

'She kept asking me to say what was on my mind so I did. She told her analyst and then the FBI.'

'When I said 'I'm breaking out,' I meant that the food here is messing with my acne.'

'I got life plus three hundred years...I won't be eligible for parole for six months...'

'I've been a burglar, a blackmailer, a mugger, and an armed robber, but by gosh I've never been a LAWYER!'

'Hey. You're back.'

'I'm in here for something I didn't do alright-I didn't pay my Council Tax!'

'Never take the stand in your own defense. The judge can reach you with the gavel.'

'When I get out, I'm going straight!'

I think I'll holiday at home this year!'