Jail Humor Pillows

Summer Arrives At Devil's Island

"Don't think outside the box. Think outside of the cell!"

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

Prisoner Crossing

'My wife says not to worry. She's convinced she can get me out of here with coupons.'

"I had money problems- forged fivers the wrong colour!"

"One night in a moment of rage. . . I removed a 'Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law' tag from a pillow!"

"How'd you know I was in for cyber crime?"

Yeah, yeah, yeah, framed by the cat - that's what we all say.

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

Conrad Black will be unable to do his investment club's tax returns this year.

'Well, you're not acting like you have every confidence in me.'

"Murder one. How about you?" "I tried to rob an arts and crafts store with a hot glue gun."

Inmate on cell phone: 'I'd like to request 'Jailhouse Rock'.'

Man in arrow suit - 'I'm in for white collar crime.'

'I'm here for jumping my bond... Bail bond.'

'The Not so Great Escape.'

Prison baseball game features Bankers vs. Wall Street.

"They weren't very friendly when they proscuted me for obtaining loans under false names."

Bullfighter and Bull Cellmates

'My first counterfeit dollar.'

'She kept asking me to say what was on my mind so I did. She told her analyst and then the FBI.'

At least you have security!

Cartoonist draws bomb next to prisoner.

'True, you've been assigned a nobody lawyer but you're a nobody criminal!'

'The SEC got me for inflating the numbers..'

"They want to spend the weekend at Daddy's" (Colour)

'It's for you.'

'When I said 'I'm breaking out,' I meant that the food here is messing with my acne.'

''Stole a Smart Car. It picked me out of a lineup.'

'I've been a burglar, a blackmailer, a mugger, and an armed robber, but by gosh I've never been a LAWYER!'

'I'm in here for something I didn't do alright-I didn't pay my Council Tax!'

'Ms. Daly, have there been any important e-mails or voice-mails during my incarceration?'

"I found your contact lens."

"Hey, this reminds me of camp when I was a kid! I won't bore you with all the stories! Well, ok. . . there was this one time. . ."