Italian Wines Gifts

Prosecco Drinker

Tartine

In the Guru District

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

Leaning Tower -After a bottle, Jean noticed the tower stopped leaning.

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

'A cheeky red?'

"And for my next trick. . . turning wine back into water."

Bacchus.

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

Sauvignon Bonk

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

'... And this is my cellar.'

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

Under pressure.

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'One more for me an Tiffany, and one more for you and the road.'

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

Pasta

'Note to self: Like coffee, homemade coffee wine should be available in decaf, too.'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

"He gets easily abstracted."

'It's my favorite.'

"I make it myself!"

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'