Ironic Song Performers Gifts

"It's the hard knocks life for us..."

"I'll bet you can't name three of their songs."

Drunken singers in a public house

"Hey samson, nice man bun."

"In closing, I'd just like to say you've been a great crowd, folks. Don't forget to tip your waitress, and I hope this final number breaks your heart the way show business broke mine."

Boy copying abstract artwork in an art gallery.

"I had money problems- forged fivers the wrong colour!"

Gigolo Diary

They stole your identity, but after seeing your credit score, they gave it back.

"I would have thought you'd be pleased."

'We run a respectable business here, Miss Faversham, so, just a reminder, no twerking!'

"Hows the protest song coming along Bill?"

"I'm composing a song for the new administration. It's entitled, 'Hell to the chief'."

Bureau of alcohol, tobacco, firearms and other neat stuff.

The New Modern-Day Lament.

Born Cynical,,,,

Self-Help Books / Fixing Others.

'I'll pay double for half as much.'

"His schlock has gravitas."

"How can one sum up Henry's impact on all our lives? Negligible, I guess that'd do it."

'I self-published a book on how to be successful. It forced me into bankruptcy.'

Downcycling with Debbie

My Life as a Troll

Trying to thumb his nose at authority, Lumpy stuck his thumb in his eye! Man covering eye with his hand.

If Global Warming is a left wing plot...it's a very good one.

"Why didn't you give granny flowers...when she could water them herself?"

Robinson Crusoe's lucky day.

"We outsourced our joyless TV dinners to a delightful couple from next door."

"Lemme tell you how I feel about high blood pressure, Mr. McGuinn."