Investment Advisors Gifts

"Hear no evil...See no evil...Just evil."

'I'm being denied access to the Warren Buffett within me.'

"The sky is falling - I just heard it from a very reliable source!"

Dog Days has been used in reference to poorly performing stocks with little future potential in the American stock market.

Man about man: 'John here sells mutual funds and worry beads.'

"'Busted' may be too strong a word. Let's just say your investment portfolio is now a negative number."

'I'm afraid we worked it to death, sir.'

"Good day, young sir! Would you care to exchange your cows for some preference shares in Beanstalk Development Industries?"

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

'Now that I have your attention...'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

British savings accounts

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"Stock options for your thoughts."

The day the stock market went UP.

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

Sen. Krupt. I don't tell constituents that we're fueling inflation. I say we're protecting consumers and thanks to us they won't have to worry about buying any cheap stuff.

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

In the Guru District

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

'That's our mission statement.'

Jack of all trades

Profit

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'