Investment Planner Gifts

RRSP once stood for Registered Retirement Savings Plan, now stands for Really, Really Small Potatoes!

"Don't blame me. I told you to day away from Flint, Michigan, Area Muni Bonds."

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

In the Guru District

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

"What's a debenture?"

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

Entering the Business Community: Assets/Liabilities

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

'Office' block tightening it's belt

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'If you're so smart, why don't you have some Index Funds in your portfolio?'

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

'Good news! Our nest egg is developing into a double yoke.'

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

The economy.

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

"Actual results indicate that the statistical analysis of the data which projections were based on may have been wrong."

E.U. Banking Union.

'And as my chart clearly shows, I don't know anything.'

'Now that we've defined 'happy deficits' let's try it out on the stockholders.'

"Have you heard? There's talk about raising the retirement age to 170?"

Fiscal cliff - US dollar falling over the edge.

European currency on the edge.

"Unfortunately Daddy already owes the government about 500,000 Pokemon cards."

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

"And we will absolutely start lending again as soon as we finish building our debtors' prison."

"Until we get a bigger chart, we're estimating it's now about up to here."