Interview Improvisers Gifts

I've always been fascinated in the manufacture of sproket head gears.

"To make this interview more entertaining I would like you to take a breath of helium before answering the questions."

Jazz is Invented

'You lack the expertise we're looking for, Mr Wheaton - but darn it, I like your attitude.'

"We offer 104 vacation days...otherwise known as weekends."

'Oh, we have an excellent benefits package ??" major medical, dental plan, vacation, retirement, nude encounter sessions....'

"Nice touch." - Resume playing music.

"I didn't bring a resume. I brought coffee and donuts."

'I see an applicant being hired!'

"I'm fascinated by your résumé, particularly the advertising supplement."

"You're 30 now. Where do you see yourself in five years?" "Thirty five."

'We have an emergency, ladies and gentlemen! We need help - can anybody in the audience play the tambourine.'

"And, of course, if I were to get the job and start feeling comfortable here I'd no longer need the security blanket."

'My resume,...in rap form!'

Your performance since you came here suggests you may have lied on your resume.

The Augie Twins write music strictly for their own amusement.

'Let me start by saying I wish I had your imagination...'

'We're looking for someone who either has a good background or can concoct a good story about one.'

"What is it about the firm's global presence that most appealed to you?"

'My next song is a little ditty about why I don't have any references,'

"My next song is a little ditty about why I don't have any references."

We're trying a new interview technique. It's called "laddering".

'I've had tight deadlines, if that's what you mean by performing well under pressure.'

'I'm a loaf of bread.'

"You're not giving me the job because I'm 'over qualified'? Oh, don't worry, most of those qualifications have been falsified."

'Human resources gave us the idea of trying 'blind interviewing'...'

"We're looking for someone just like you but with testicles."

'We've run out of one-man plays - why not make it up with the rest of the drama group?'

We hadn't realised your body language was French....

"And I suppose my greatest feature is that I don't mind kissing a little booty to get ahead!"

"The whole thing is basically fiction. But I just thought my resume could use some spice."

'Your r

Bird Cage Cover over Wife's Head

"Thanks for coming in again. Sorry about the last time. I must have pulled the wrong lever by mistake."

'Would you cart to explain this three page gap in your resume?'