Internet Security Enthusiast Gifts

GCHQ is following you on Twitter. . . and Facebook . . .

'I don't know. I heard you have to be careful getting stuff online.'

'Oh oh! My Internet security software is directing recommendations, from my broker, to the junk file.'

'I think your firewall is turned up too high!'

"Password-sharing?! I only agreed to exchange vows...No one said anything about exchanging passwords!"

'This is Richard - he's been the victim of identity theft...'

'I'm a pharmacist, and I still can't read this CAPTCHAs.'

"You're not old enough for Twitter until you stop peeping."

"I hope the people who hacked Sony don't get a hold of my recipe for Tuna Ole."

'And if you buy this spyware we'll throw in this keyhole shaped monitor.'

'Computer crime seems to be on the rise.'

'Your username can be yellow lab but your password will have to be Sheeba893.'

"Matt was a victim of identity fraud."

'I see your office is as secure as your website.'

'...and at 2:00 you'll be whispering into millions of ears that it's okay to download that attachment.'

'Where was the TSA?'

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

"On a positive note, he's not our boss. He's the guy who stole our boss's identity."

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

A Little Extra

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

Roger Buffle Jr. supplies his father with yet another computer password.

'Kumor's responsible for all the computer passwords, so the boss had him encrypted.'

"The new computer is great, but we can't get rid of the old one. It knows too much."

"Sorry kid, I work alone."

CCTV in church.

"These targeted ads are getting out of hand."

"Get used to verifications. In the court of the internet, you are presumed a robot until proven otherwise."

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

"Hackers, Sire! They've broken through our firewall."

"WIFI, Amazon, credit cards. Pretty much every password is named after me."

"Some fine day, my son, all this will be yours."

The Ayatollah Bomb?

"This is Alexander. He’ll be heading up our hacking division."

"Are you sure you updated the anti-virus software?"