Internet Scam Investigator Gifts

Email Forwards - Self Treatment for Hemorrhoids.

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

Alternative Medicine

"Since he's been a plagiarist, committed perjury and runs a Ponzi scheme, trust can be an issue."

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

"..Your analysis and medication would be perfect if you were a goat."

'See, dear, you can't believe everything you read. It says so right here on the internet!'

"Honey, are we watching TV or is it watching us?"

The new Physics

"....and then it turned out that the e-mail I ignored that I got from the Nigerian bank offering me £200 million was REAL!"

'I can't believe an Alligator stole my identity... I mean, it's quite obvious I'm a Crocodile!'

"Didn't I warn you about buying medication from the internet?!"

'While these products may not result in weight loss, they will result in credibility loss.'

'That's part of the reason for our problem. We lost the key to the door.'

Tiger discovers the online wildlife trade.

"I only told a few friends."

"If this is secret information the government doesn't want us to know, how come we can read about it on facebook?"

"They'll never guess how we stole their data."

Spam traps on mobiles

Industrial Injuries Benefit.

"Yes, I'm a superhero. I'm not attractive, muscular or charming because I work in the 'cyber crimes' division."

"You have been specially selected to upload your bank details. Offer ends midnight."

Fake Counterfeit Money

"Hello, I am a Nigerian Prince and I need your help!!! Please send me $500 and your bank routing number. You will rewarded with 10% of 12.7 million dollars and my undying friendship. Best wishes, Prince John Barron."

I'd rather be phishing.

'I find if I'm the first one in and the first one out, Ponzi schemes can be very lucrative.'

'Computer crime' 'To see your belongings visit our website www,burgular.com'

"According to the insurance company, you don't have a leg to stand on."

'...if he only knew what I wrote about him on my blog.'

"The tweet you posted last night struck a chord around the world, united all factions, and basically altered the course of humanity."

"We've gleaned all we need to know about you from the internet, but we'll keep your resume as a great example of creative writing."

"I don't know man. It sounds a lot like a pyramid scheme to me."