Internet Health Guru Gifts

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

Self help acupuncture

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"We need to update your entire operating system."

'Is this still America?'

Coronavirus Sisyphys

"I'd like to start the 'Wellness at Work' training by offering you some guidance on diet and exercise."

Coronavirus Waves

"Here...let me call an expert...someone who knows about these things."

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

'It's nothing that a few stem cells and 75 years of research can't fix.'

National Academy of Sport

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

'I gotta lose some weight.'

Keep Fit.

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

Congratulations on the new you!

"Eat your vegetarian or you'll go extinct!"

"You're sick of this? Just try to imagine how we feel."

'Apply that ointment as directed and call me if the growth does not reduce or it starts to talk.'

'Doctor, how much acupuncture experience DO you have?'

'Follow this diet, and soon the temple of your soul will just be a small chapel.'

The Canary in the Coal Mine

"Your bedside health care book ... thanks for not reading it."

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy