Instruction Lover Gifts

Institute Of Multi-Tasking

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

Hanging off every word...

'It all started when he tried to assemble a backyard gym without reading the instructions.'

Super Student

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

'They say my tests are too hard. Maybe I should switch from Essay to Connect-the-Dot.'

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

'Dad taught me how to tie my shoes, and I taught him how to program the computer.'

'I'm partially passing my Meteorology course.'

"I'm doing all I can to make the little things count."

"Why don't you try learning from your own mistakes?"

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

Manual Worker

'OK Sheldon - which part of the Unified Field Theory do you not understand?'

Where the hell did you get that brain ?

"You're applying for this job because your mother told you to. Well, I guess that's a good thing in a compliance officer."

'We think Rome was built at night sir, because last week you told us that Rome wasn't built in a day!'

"I didn't learn anything in school today but I'll learn twice as much tomorrow."

'Are you ready for me to read the instructions yet?'

"So you can do your homework. That's why you have to learn to read and write."

Man getting into his space suit the wrong way up

"What is the battle cry for homeschoolers?" Kids: "Go Home!"

"Everyone seems to be having no trouble assembling our products. Apparently, we're making our instructions too easy."

Dr. Roy G. Biv, Rainbowologist.

Back to School.

'I'm your dog, Sir. Would you teach me some old tricks?'

Flying Fish Learning To Fly.

'You can't just get up and leave without permission.'

"A school's purpose is to excite, engage and stimulate its students' minds...or so I'm told."