Learning Lover Gifts

The trouble with education is everyone knows how to teach, but nobody knows how to learn.

'Once you've got this mastered, Ellen, then you can try it on two.'

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

'Well, that didn't do any good -- I'm STILL illiterate!'

'Sanjay will be giving my report on 'OUTSOURCING'.'

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

Do I get partial credit?

'OK Sheldon - which part of the Unified Field Theory do you not understand?'

"A school's purpose is to excite, engage and stimulate its students' minds...or so I'm told."

"Almost 30 percent of teachers assign extra reading during Hispanic Heritage Month."

"I'm doing all I can to make the little things count."

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

'Dr Hodges, here, is from England and he's been observing us for 14 years. Mr Ferrell, an American, has been here only 3 weeks. Monique Corveu, from Paris, has practically been living with us for about nine years...'

School Cafeteria. It's the start of the school year. The Geometry teacher will come by to verify that we're serving truly square meals. The grammar teacher says the alphabet soup is runny and needs some punctuation added. History teachers keep a record of all the past meals and so will notice any leftovers being served. And the computer lab staff expressed concern about all the cookies so the astronomy teacher suggested switching to candy for dessert. I'll bet she thinks Starburst and Milk

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

Keeping all the balls in the air - skills

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

Super Student

Hanging off every word...

Child writes letter to Santa reading 'Sorry Santa, I DO want to go to school'.

Teacher has two boxes: "Book Smart" and "Street Smart"

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

'Dad taught me how to tie my shoes, and I taught him how to program the computer.'

'I'm partially passing my Meteorology course.'

'Miss, I think I've learnt all I can too.'

"We call it 'learning to read', not 'battling illiteracy'."

"Why don't you try learning from your own mistakes?"

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

'The trouble with education is everyone knows how to teach, but nobody knows how to learn.'

Good writing is good thinking