Instruction Literalist Pillows

"This is the fourth student who bubbled in Y-O-U-R N-A-M-E when I told the class to 'bubble in your name'!"

"You say it all the time, so I climbed every tree to prove it. You were right, money doesn't grow on trees."

'It all started when he tried to assemble a backyard gym without reading the instructions.'

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

'Larry liked to crack the window before bed.'

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

"Actually, not all roses are red. Sometimes they're white as well as numerous other colours. Also I think you'll find that violets are sort of purple..."

"What can you do with him?"

'I like thinking inside the box.'

Man sees book flying in the Mystery section.

"I said 'follow,' not stalk your bliss!"

It's not a figure of speech - this is the corporate ladder.

This must be the address where Joe and Maureen are throwing the dinner party!

Well, yes, it's a free library, but...

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."

Manual Worker

'When I said, throw him out, I didn't mean it literally.'

Jude completely misunderstands his doctor's request for a stool sample.

'Are you ready for me to read the instructions yet?'

"I'd text you, but I haven't learnt to spell yet."

The town of Irony, Pennsylvania has long been known for being very literal,

"Everyone seems to be having no trouble assembling our products. Apparently, we're making our instructions too easy."

"I took your advice."

Society for Taking Things a bit too Literally.

"You asked if I could type blood."

'You can't just get up and leave without permission.'

'I don't get it, Dad. If grandma's not a card player, then why did you say she's not dealing with a full deck?'

"Maybe if you'd read the instructions then you'd be able to solve it."

STRIP Hambone: Flossing the keyboard

'You precisely said 'straight over at the roundabout'. You didn't say anything about going around it.'

And it goes without saying that...

'Well, you told me not to walk through the kitchen in muddy boots!'

Bus Stop (bus hovering overhead)

"Don't cry this time, it is off putting."

"Your supermarket delivery."