Incompetent Airplane Builder Gifts

"He built his own airplane from a kit."

Do it yourself books.

"The problem with these instructions is that they assume I have the attention span to actually read something."

Dave took his motto, 'Roofing done in one hour' seriously, even nailing shingles before plywood had been put down.

"Well, it is a good property. The price is low because it is harder to negotiate due to its S-bend configuration."

"Isn't technology great? A drone dog walker."

'As I always say, 'If at first you don't get a passing building inspection report, get mad and tear it up.''

Reality home-improvement show.

"Let's welcome our new member, Bob!" "You, too!" "'You, too'? Idiot!"

Employers: Workers, toil until death!

'No-one else would brag about being on Rogue Traders.'

Sundayafternoon Carpenters

Scre

"Nice igloo, but why isn't it melting?!"

"That'll teach you for buying cheap paintbrushes!!"

"Your father was trying to build a better mouse trap."

Carpenter.

It quickly became apparent to Daryl that his remote controlled lawn mower was not a good idea.

Man knocked out by doorframe leading into a basketball court.

Snooker Channel.

"He's making a retirement statement - he's burning all his DIY books."

Excess Baggage: Many hotels, inspired by the airlines, are gouging their guests by adding 'resort fees' to the room rates.

'My son, the non traditionalist.'

Will the anti-Covid vaccine also be available for poor countries?"

"What happened to your finger?"

A man uses a radio control for inline skates.

"Sure, it will be an eyesore, but after we build a lot of them, it'll fit right in!"

'Wait...Where was I going again? Oh. That's right.'

Hand being hit with a hammer.

Building Problem

'Hip pointers are not the most serious sports injuries. They're just really embarrassing.'

'Is that where the 1% live, Dad?'

Man Nailed to Wall

"It was awful, Ted. The right hand never knew what the left hand was doing to it."