Ideology Juggler Gifts

"No, you can't be a venture socialist, because they don't exist!"

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

Introducing...Anagraman.

'There are lies, damn lies, and statistics. We're looking for someone who can make all three of these work for us.'

In Tray, Out Tray, and Shredded Paper Tray

New Ideas in Business.

"I had considered hyphenating my last name, but now I'm leaning towards and underscore."

'You've got us backward. I'm Vinnie, and my short and subtle brother is Vignette.'

"Why do parishioners only eat half their donuts???" "Partial indulgence."

'Hmmm...It is: innocent until proven guilty? Or is it: guilty until proven innocent?'

'We don't have anyone here by that name. Was he perhaps using one of his aliases?'

If you're a multiple personality could you spare an identity for an amnesiac?

"I was explaining the zero aggression principle, and all of a sudden, POW!!"

"He's a middle-aged white man. What other reason do you need?"

'Hey! - why bicker all evening when we could be watching a film about ideological genocide.'

'We have to be more innovative but not in an out-of-the-box way.'

A man holding a pro-life sign stands above a group of beaten people who are pro choice.

A statue of Mercury is defaced with a purse, stockings, a bra and lipstick.

"I, for one, do not enjoy these BYO agenda meetings."

The Basic Blueprint for 99% of Today's Conversations (or So it Seems)

"My name is Phil, and I, too, am..."

Triple espresso. Forget it, Uncle Mort. Your doctors said no caffeine. I am not your Uncle Mort, I am someone else altogether. Oh yeah? Who are you? I am … Drinkum … Coffeeman … Worthington-Smythe … of the Florida Coffeeman-Worthington-Smythes. You may have heard of us ... we're a family of um ... Troubadours. I, myself, wrote several ballads for the likes of Sinatra, Pat Boone, and Jimi Hendrix. So if I were to Google that right now, Google would confirm that? Google is an abomination!!! One ge

"I'm using my married name right now, but I'm keeping my maiden name on ice, just in case."

"Is this your joke of an idea?"

"I'm doing my part to conserve electricity."

Vote. I can't keep up with politics anymore --- That guy said he's a "big government anarchist"!

Socialism and Capitalism Traps

'Well, technically speaking, we do have a conscience...'

Let's merge and cut out the middle man.

The Russian Circus

'I was so damn close to success when I created 'neckbook'.'

Democratic Progressivism Is a Dead Letter

Sitting man.

"I unfollow people when they ask me to think for myself. I mean, who has the time?"

'Attack!'