Ideology Challenger Gifts

"Don't drink the Kool-Aid! 'Science' is a scam dreamed up by the interlectual elite to keep us down!"

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"Lori, go ahead and toss in 'Lolita.' Now, what's next?" "We'll need more lighter fluid." "'The Lottery' is devils work." "We must protect the children." "Book burning club"

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

"Mainstream? Who's to say what's mainstream?"

Rejuvenile Delinquents.

"I understand the allure of religion. It offers hope in a world that's often cruel and unfair. But religion's promises have been consistently proven false. Science, on the other hand, has actually delivered the things that improve human life...."

"Ever notice how grateful people are when you present them with facts contrary to their beliefs?"

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

"How on earth do you get this blasted box to open...?"

"These cartoons are insulting! I don't like it at all! I would never watch something that shows Latinos like this!"

Bee Chess

Caricature of Noam Chomsky

'Confusionism'

"I was explaining the zero aggression principle, and all of a sudden, POW!!"

'And this is what Larry calls his 'man cave'.'

"Remember, we're not just making money. We're building prisons."

"He's a middle-aged white man. What other reason do you need?"

A man holding a pro-life sign stands above a group of beaten people who are pro choice.

"Republican striptease"

"Wanna come over and watch the big game?....I was actually talking about the new 'Pac-Man vs. Superman' X-box game."

"Welcome aboard, Ms Pebble. We felt you fit our boardroom image rather well."

Socialism and Capitalism Traps

"Your profile says you're a lumberjack, I though they were all big buggers."

"No, you can't be a venture socialist, because they don't exist!"

"Just stop and ask for directions...we are going to miss Rihanna!"

"I changed Siri's voice to a man, now it won't ask google for directions."

'Would it be more economical for them to develop their own comparable product, or steal the competition's formulae and fight it out in the courts?'

"Jewish people go out for Chinese food, but do you ever see Chinese people going out for Jewish food?"

"That's an interesting question, Clint. I don't know if my gun rack is an authentic regionalism or just a macho affectation."

"Before I say anything, I'd like to have my friend, who wants to be a lawyer when he grows up, present"

'Give me the most soft and gentle looking unicorn tattoo you've got!'

'Yeah, I'm an atheist - and a damn good one.'

"...It's just that I feel I've become typecast."

The full male cycle