Humorous Deity Devotee Gifts

God asks an angel for change for a tower viewer.

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

Night-time halo

"Someone throw him a punchline!"

"OMG, LOL!"

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

'You don't have to be a boring bastard to work here but it helps.'

Drive-thru Church

'You know, I never have had a sabbatical....'

Chuck didn't care what his therapist said; that is not where he left his dummy.

"Ready...."

Shortly after being accepted into John's heart, Jesus lodged in aorta.

Two men in T-shirts, one shirt says Jesus loves me, the other Jesus loves me more.

'5.40pm on the 2nd day....and still waiting for the surveyor'

'Oh, sure -- but He won't let US have pets!'

"Our cat is the only god this home needs."

Dante Alighieri

'Let's see,,, You're answering prayers until 9:30,, Your Armageddon meeting's been pushed to 2:00 and it looks like your speaking engagement in Mrs, Ingersol's head is postponed 'til Thursday,'

'Actually, we were hoping for a less high-maintenance God.'

God changes His will.

'Don't sweat it - We grade on the curve.'

God's Manicure.

'You don't want to go to hell, J.B. In hell, the market is always down.'

''Halliburton'? Wait a minute! -- I meant for the MEEK to inherit the Earth!'

'That's Saint Throbbold. Patron saint of migraine.'

'Did you or did you not make my client laugh so hard that milk came out his nose, causing the kids at his cafeteria table to laugh at him?'

Singulars: spaghetto, broccolo, jacuzzo.

Angel hitchhiker has sign: 'Bible Belt'

'Thank you for calling the Pearly Gates.. your prayers are important to us and may be monitored for training purposes.'

Jesus is coming. Look busy.