Humorous Cooks Gifts

'Needs more kale.'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

A Club Sandwitch.

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

Amy Sedaris

'If you order...You can digest it in...'

Luigi's Career Change From Pizza Shop Owner to Masseuse Goes Smoothly...

Tartar sauce.

'We thank you for this food and ask you to protect us from pesticides, additives and preservatives.'

"I've been a chef for far too long...."

"Oh -- just scrape it off."

Chef: 'Howz that Octopus coming along Jeff?'

Great Moments in Culinary History.

Dinner Cereal, Corn Flakes with Spaghetti Sauce.

"Much of his cooking suffers from burn-out."

'The two things you cook best are meatloaf and apple pie!... Which one is this?'

"How many times must I tell you, the floor is sloping?"

'Mmmm. How do you get the custard so creamy? You must give me the recipie!'

Noodle exchange program.

"It's a recipe for apple pie."

'Something in the fridge has gone off.'

The cake diet.

"Bingo, that's what I thought: It's a blood-sausage!"

'Mom's a lousy cook.'

Your Dinner is in the Tin

'I thought it was my turn to cook, but I didn't make anything because I wanted you to take me out to eat.'

Roger wouldn't prepare any meal without first consulting his pie chart.

Whoa! Willard, you know you can't put metal in a microwave! Why not just heat it the old fashioned way and use your nostrils?

Tofu: Firm, Soft, Amusingly Jiggly

"Our rule of thumb is: if it tastes good, don't eat it."

'I'll tell you what's for dinner if you'll promise not to laugh.'

'How did you ever get this job, Mom?'