Humorist In Safety Gifts

"And WHATEVER you do DON'T FALL DOWN THE STEPS or put your finger in the ELECTRICITY socket."

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

'Another one? Do you realize it will make the third time this month we've held a fire drill?'

Noah's life jacket demonstration

Driving on the Beach - Lifeguard on a hydraulic lift.

Mountain Climber With Pillow Padding.

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

Safety Barriers

Fire door.

Fume Leaks on aeroplane - 'Perfume? Drinks? Air?'

"Ya know, that cork was there for a reason."

'This is your lucky day!'

"I did warn you about doing that, Gorak. . ."

'Guns Galore Inc' 'Prolong your Life'

'Sander's a bit high isn't it?'

"I thought he would run all sorts of scientific tests."

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

'Coins, when swallowed, cause cancer. Perhaps money should be banned.'

'The most important safety rule to follow when doing anything dangerous is to first find out who can sue you when you get hurt.'

A Not So Grand Slam.

'As a part of a cost-cutting experiment all of our safety measures will be replaced with these good luck charms.'

Health & Safety Official Tester.

Jet Turbine Testing Area

"Safe? Of course it's safe! I do fireworks every year!"

Athlete

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

'Believe it or not you're our greatest liability Jones!'

"What makes you think we have to contact OSHA?"

'I'm bored, what can I do?' 'Go and play with your Junior Bomb Disposal kit.'

Cotton candy

Climb to Safety in Case of Alien Invasion

'I baked it especially for you.'

Security at the Smaller Airports

Living life dangerously 2010.

'Oh no, he's only the Health and Safety Officer.'