Humor In Safety Gifts

'So, what's it like to lick a light socket, Mr. Safety?'

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

'Another one? Do you realize it will make the third time this month we've held a fire drill?'

Noah's life jacket demonstration

Driving on the Beach - Lifeguard on a hydraulic lift.

Mountain Climber With Pillow Padding.

Safety Barriers

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

Fire door.

"Ya know, that cork was there for a reason."

Fume Leaks on aeroplane - 'Perfume? Drinks? Air?'

"I did warn you about doing that, Gorak. . ."

'Guns Galore Inc' 'Prolong your Life'

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

'As I always say, 'If at first you don't get a passing building inspection report, get mad and tear it up.''

'Coins, when swallowed, cause cancer. Perhaps money should be banned.'

'The most important safety rule to follow when doing anything dangerous is to first find out who can sue you when you get hurt.'

'As a part of a cost-cutting experiment all of our safety measures will be replaced with these good luck charms.'

Health & Safety Official Tester.

Jet Turbine Testing Area

"Safe? Of course it's safe! I do fireworks every year!"

"What makes you think we have to contact OSHA?"

"I said, you have to be active in your own rescue!"

"And WHATEVER you do DON'T FALL DOWN THE STEPS or put your finger in the ELECTRICITY socket."

Living life dangerously 2010.

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

Security at the Smaller Airports

'I'm bored, what can I do?' 'Go and play with your Junior Bomb Disposal kit.'

'Oh no, he's only the Health and Safety Officer.'

Athlete

'I baked it especially for you.'

'No, no, I've gone through all the steps in the procedure and I don't see anything about totally immersing yourself in oil before starting the job!!

Department of Health and Safety: Knock (but not too loudly or you may suffer knuckle bruising) And Enter (Beware of tripping over the fireproof carpet).

'They say these vans are unsafe when fully loaded, so we're only going to allow 50 of you in at a time.'

"Okay scouts, that ends today's online soldering session!"