Humorist In Nutrition Gifts

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

'Do you have to use that? -- tongue depressors make me hungry.'

'According to the weight chart, if you were a condor, you'd have a wingspan of 97 feet.'

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

'The customer is always right...'

Looking at belt - "One more notch, room for desert."

'The doctor told me to introduce more greens into my diet.'

You are what you eat (Nuts).

"I'm on a diet, how many calories in a fly?"

"I've had enough sweets for one day."

"Well, then - two apples a day."

"Do you realize what the sodium content of this water is?"

Free Range Chickens

Milk Toast: One of the World's Most Deadly Foods!

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

'The items with the little hearts will clog your arteries the fastest.'

'It's a simple matter of checks and balances: your waistline has spread and your brain has shrunk.'

'Don't be tempted, Mrs. Root, just mail those apple fritters right here to me!'

"We learnt about nutrition at school today Mum: Our diet didn't rate well at all..."

Middle Age Spread.

'You'll like this. It has no nutritional value at all.'

'I try to eat a varied diet. One day I'll eat dark chocolate, one day I'll eat white chocolate and one day I'll eat milk chocolate.'

Maybe yuou simply have too many omega 3 fatty acids

You are what you eat

A worm sits in comfort as he has just eaten 4 apples by himself...

"How come there's a forbidden fruit but not a forbidden vegetable?"

"There were days he could kill for a piece of tofu."