Humorist For Justice Gifts

This government special reserve fund is like a cookie jar for crooked cronies!

Stop Sexual Exploitation At Work!

'What'll it be?'

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

"Impartiality becomes you."

"In view of the new evidence, my client would like to change his plea to 'guilty-ish', M'Lud."

Judge

During the Holiday season, Mr. Arthur Jeffries takes a little time to think of those who are less fortunate.

Sonny Bono - Singer/US Congressman.

"Twenty years? What ever happened to revolving-door justice?"

'And so 'Your Honor'... if that really is your name...'

"O.K., O.K., house arrest."

Dreary counsel sending the judge and jury to sleep

"We all make mistakes, as Your Honor knows, having been twice reprimanded by the New York State Commission on Juridical Conduct."

'I think you should just plead ignorance, it's so. . . credible.'

'Calm down. I heard them say we're just going into town for haircuts.'

Lawyers chasing a sacrificial lamb.

'I can't remember. Are you my lawyer, or am I yours?'

"Your honor, we'll stipulate to the fact that he looks guilty."

'Guilty? Do you realize what that will do to my 'Who's Who' listing?'

'We need our lawyers to perform CPR on this group...Confuse, Perplex and Rattle.'

'I'm sure the Senate will affirm my action.'

Prosecutor trying to link parking tickets and library fines with gangland killings.

'I've been sued. Can I counter-sue for the stress caused by being sued?'

Don't worry his majesty with all this talk of 'big city lawyers'.

"I've rented the extra room to an escaped convict - maybe you know him."

'...Plus thirty days for not turning off your damn cell phone!'

'You can plead 'guilty,' or you can plead 'not guilty' - You can't plead 'no big deal'!'

The US Supreme Court displays its rulings out front.

'When I offered the bribe, Your Honor, I was just being polite.'

Boy with policeman - "That's Kevin's new tagging device!"

Ladies-Gents-Whatever

'No kidding? -- Nine life sentences?'