Humor Wrangler Gifts

"Just a sec honey...Mommy has to cut this up into little pieces, so the vacuum can pick it up easier."

"Excuse me, but I believe you are in my seat."

High Riders of the Old West

Sybil Obama

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

Temporary and Permanent Writer's Block

'There are no stupid questions, so let's also agree there are no stupid answers.'

"Rumour has it that you're after my job."

"The 'Queer Eye' people came by - but they fled."

'OK...now what?'

'Did you want me, boss?'

"I work out of my house filled with kids and pets. My hobby is trying to keep sane."

The Critic...

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

'I can grant you 3 wishes as long as none of them are about getting up on the furniture.'

An expletive of editors

"I handle chatty people for him."

Mr Tom Noddy's First Day With the Hounds Pt. 1

"What's the problem Cowboy? Never heard of Cattle Driving before?"

Coping during the 6 weeks school holidays.

"Can we forget about our dainty little tracks in the snow for five seconds and try to concentrate on what we're out here for?"

"Not guilty, because your lawyer came up with some great excuses."

"Don't try to understand them, just ride and rope and brand them."

"It's broken I'm afraid." "Will I be able to work?" "Depends. What do you do?" "Oh, I'm just a cowpoke for Circle 'Y' Ranch."

"Year, pets do teach kids about responsibility. When they won't get off their butts, they know I'll be responsible."

"Hitch up your horse, Tex. It's time for lunch."

Christo's greatest challenge.

"No one is making you do anything you don't want. I'm just saying we're all headed for Dodge City and we think you should come along."

There were occasional moments when she questioned her decision to work with truly gifted students.

Ballroom. Political Forum. At least they served lunch during that rambling incoherent speech. Alphabet soup and a word salad.

"That's fathering."

'Well, having a general opinion that fits every topic keeps him from wasting words...'

Sunshine Dog Obedience School