Script Wrangler Gifts

'It's tough to swallow!'

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

Quality Control

Moses holds up new federal regulation guidelines.

"I find it so stimulating to learn new software."

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

'ACE Heating and cooling' 'What's Hot' 'What Not'

'Should be home soon. I'm just clearing away the usual paperwork.'

Editor.

"So, do you see yourself as a car valet who writes screenplays or a screen writer who parks cars?"

"Ain't isn't a word, and you know it."

'Ah, the Bermuda Rectangle for files.'

"Providing great customer care is of course important, but shall we start with how you manage forms TG-45S through to NSD-89b."

Temporary and Permanent Writer's Block

"Well, I've finished the project on time and on budget!" "That means I've given you too much time and too much money!"

An astronaut sees a sign saying zoning in force.

He waited for the next wave of regulations to arrive.

"We need warning stickers on this side warning not to ignore all the other warning stickers on the other side."

"I'm afraid that due to a recent reorientation of forward facing customer resource functionality you're going to have to make the complaint to yourself... in triplicate."

Fed up with unnecessary bureaucracy?...what people don't appreciate is that if they don't fill out their C90D then how can we POSSIBLY know how many C90ds there ARE!

"I told my manager that I couldn't cope with the endless mind numbing paperwork. I said I'd had enough of the bureaucracy, that I had to get out."

"We need a better piling system."

'The government is keen not to interfere with private enterprise.'

"I'm sorry, but you'll have to get approval from the offices of Terminology, Evidence, Proof of Demand, Documentation, Measurement and Predictions before I can even think about signing off."

"People whinge about the irrelevance and duplication of paperwork, but if the forms aren't filled out how are we supposed to know how many forms have been completed?"

See District Directors

Literary rain

"Check out my free white paper!"

Colin finds it difficult to let go of paperwork.

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

'The fact that the expenses process is complicated confusing and bureaucratic isn't an Aberration.'

Bureau of Missing Door Knobs

"My dog always knows when it's about to rain."

Federal Bureau of Bureaucrats: 'Regulation - the mother's milk of politics!'