Housing Market Sleuth Gifts

'It seems good, and he said the bit at the bottom is the name of the architect.'

At first I thought it was just coincidence, but then I realized it corresponded directly to your shift.

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

"Aren't you the estate agent who sold us this house?"

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

'He's a blight on the whole neighbourhood.'

'Gee! You must have lost some on this property!'

TV show is called Repossesion Repossession. Man says: 'I see the property shows are reacting to the economic downturn.'

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

"Local authorities are always whining on about the cost of 'affordable' housing..."

House hunting is cruel.

'Oh no! We're in negative equity.'

"To be honest, I'd be stupid not to take advantage of the market."

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

'Forget my mortgage application, fill this bag with money. I've decided to make a cash offer!'

"We just need more wiggle room."

'We can't decide between raising kids and raising a mortgage deposit.'

'Look at my new overdraft its fantastic.'

Updated Classic: Bleak House Sales

"For sale £470,000 house included"

'We could easily share this nest: You would use it during the day and I would use it at night...'

'Lower the price by ?30k!' 'He's trying to kick-start the housing market.'

'Yes, there is a bidding war - but I'm almost certain you aren't allowed to take prisoners.'

"I remember when you used to see 3 or 4 of these a week!"

"This article says that the number of elderly living with their children is rising..."

'I'm sorry, but without a significant deposit, we can't give you a mortgage.'

"No, I do not live in my parents basement...it's a walk out."

"Homeowner please help."

'I can't move in with my parents. They moved in with my grandparents.

'Property ownership is SO nineties! Gerald and I sold our house to a private consortia and are leasing back.'

Freddy Mac and Fannie Mae.