Housing Crisis Hero Gifts

"We're sitting on a landbank that could accommodate tens of thousands of new homes. We can wait a few years and generate even more profit..."

'Not a word to Alfred, but the spare bedroom is worth losing the fourteen pounds!'

"And what do you think of the government's record on housing?"

"Privare equity bought the dam and jacked up rent. Nests are next."

"The government prefers to see it as a flexible, environmentally friendly building option that fits within our current funding projections."

Rising Housing Costs vs Wages.

Homeless count.

'We do have something in Real Estate for an individual who's willing to starve for a year before turning to the office supplies.'

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

"If the nanny state wants us to solve the housing crisis they need to get out of the way and let us learn from the leaders in the field..."

House hunting is cruel.

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

Wait! It might be cheaper to just knock it down and build from scratch.

"I'm going to look for a mortgage...I may be some time!"

"The only thing we seem to have in your price range is a bird box in Billericay."

"Hmmm, as far as I can gather, unfortunately, it is an eviction notice: we need to find a new home. . ."

"There, that's better!"

'Surely it is no longer legal to include 'deposit of your first-born child'?'

How often do the planes fly overhead..?

'I leave in three weeks.'

"We had to get builders to stop hoarding land and start building houses...extreme forms of persuasion were called for!"

Land Sale

"Sorry honey, but moving boxes are sold out everywhere because of the rising rents..."

"You're moving in with us? We were going to move in with you."

"Their entire friendship is based on regret over property they SHOULD have bought when it was affordable."

"Just to let you know - we're putting up your rent again..."

"What do you mean, you got evicted?"

"Nowadays we all have to make sacrifices and 2500 bucks a month for this beautiful two-room apartment is really not too much to ask."

Real estate: 'Sure, it's a long commute, but the price is right!'

Cut and Paste.

"One BHK, two baths, and sixty three plug points."

"Star Wars. . . Batman. . . Pirates. . . What we should be building is affordable housing."