Housing Activist Gifts

"Just to let you know - we're putting up your rent again..."

Affordable housing: no vacancy.

Unseemly/Unaffordable

"Hmmm, as far as I can gather, unfortunately, it is an eviction notice: we need to find a new home. . ."

"Privare equity bought the dam and jacked up rent. Nests are next."

"Since the council started refurbishing to a high standard he's having difficulty letting his rat infested shoeboxes."

Low Budget Real Estate

'Couldn't pay the mortgage.'

"Sorry honey, but moving boxes are sold out everywhere because of the rising rents..."

'Not a word to Alfred, but the spare bedroom is worth losing the fourteen pounds!'

"When we said we'd build 'affordable' homes we had a particular buyer in mind."

"And what do you think of the government's record on housing?"

"The government prefers to see it as a flexible, environmentally friendly building option that fits within our current funding projections."

Homeless count.

"Harold - We gotta come up with tag names and go over it - That's how we reclaim our block."

House hunting is cruel.

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

"We're sitting on a landbank that could accommodate tens of thousands of new homes. We can wait a few years and generate even more profit..."

"There, that's better!"

'Surely it is no longer legal to include 'deposit of your first-born child'?'

"We had to get builders to stop hoarding land and start building houses...extreme forms of persuasion were called for!"

Cycle Lane

Neighborhood hygiene

"Their entire friendship is based on regret over property they SHOULD have bought when it was affordable."

Pop-up neighborhood

Foreclosure.

'It's a perfect starter teepee.'

"Nowadays we all have to make sacrifices and 2500 bucks a month for this beautiful two-room apartment is really not too much to ask."

"What do you mean, you got evicted?"

Real estate: 'Sure, it's a long commute, but the price is right!'

Cut and Paste.

"Star Wars. . . Batman. . . Pirates. . . What we should be building is affordable housing."

Box reads: 'DIRECT ACTION MAN'.

'You're a single person on benefits with too many rooms - we're downsizing you!'

"We could easily sell this place—it shows nicely."