Affordable Housing Advocate Gifts

Real estate: 'Sure, it's a long commute, but the price is right!'

"Their entire friendship is based on regret over property they SHOULD have bought when it was affordable."

"I knew that some children have to return home after university, but I didn't think it would be the lecturers."

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

Estate Agent showing client his parents' house - '...and here's one from our affordable homes range'

"When we said we'd build 'affordable' homes we had a particular buyer in mind."

"And what do you think of the government's record on housing?"

"Privare equity bought the dam and jacked up rent. Nests are next."

'We did have one property in your price range, but I'm afraid we sold it in 1943.'

Uncle Sam and health care.

"The government prefers to see it as a flexible, environmentally friendly building option that fits within our current funding projections."

Homeless count.

House hunting is cruel.

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

'I saw a Miniature Dachshund today. NICE dog for a city apartment.'

'I'm kind of a survivalist myself. I roast my own coffee and distil my own gin.'

"Hmmm, as far as I can gather, unfortunately, it is an eviction notice: we need to find a new home. . ."

"We're sitting on a landbank that could accommodate tens of thousands of new homes. We can wait a few years and generate even more profit..."

"There, that's better!"

From learning how to use an oven to overthrowing the system.

"We had to get builders to stop hoarding land and start building houses...extreme forms of persuasion were called for!"

"Sorry honey, but moving boxes are sold out everywhere because of the rising rents..."

Pop-up neighborhood

"Just to let you know - we're putting up your rent again..."

'It's a perfect starter teepee.'

"What do you mean, you got evicted?"

Cut and Paste.

'I live an alternative lifestyle. I pay my bills.'

"Star Wars. . . Batman. . . Pirates. . . What we should be building is affordable housing."

Plane annoys penthouse apartment.

'You're a single person on benefits with too many rooms - we're downsizing you!'

'Of course, for the compact budget we offer the Shelterette Programme.'

Low Budget Real Estate

Man with mousey nose running a health food store