Hospital Aide Gifts

'My aide has a great sense of humor, but you'd never guess it from his bed pan delivery.'

Opportunities in Coronatimes

2021

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

vaccine wars.

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

"Our war is against cancer."

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

'Well, well, well...'

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

"The first one's just a warning."

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

"I'm feeling completely wiped out."

Social distancing

Vehicles are having their own election. These are the candidates. The ambulance appeals to voters who think health care is most important. Voters focusing on education issues favor the school bus. And those wanting family-friendly policies are backing the minivan. The tractor is an expert on agricultural issues, and the import is a free trade advocate. Those voters concerned about environmental issues like the electric hybrid, and those wanting a strong military support the Jeep. What's t

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

PSA Banter.

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"The doctor wanted me to let you know that everything is fine, but your c-section didn't go quite as planned. it was more like a 'K' section..."

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

Dracula in a Vampire Hospital getting some extra blood from a Human blood drip

"Let's consider an early dive."

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.