Hospital Helper Gifts

Outpatient recovery lot

Medical Team

'If you could roll up your sleeves, go behind the screen and plaster the wall.'

"It make syou kind of proud to be helping to build this giant new hospital doesn't it!!"

Nurse

Opportunities in Coronatimes

2021

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

vaccine wars.

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

A midwife holding a baby

"Our war is against cancer."

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

'Well, well, well...'

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

"The first one's just a warning."

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

"I'm afraid you could go at any time."

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

Social distancing

PSA Banter.

Doctor pulling golf caddy sees patient pulling oxygen caddy.

"The doctor wanted me to let you know that everything is fine, but your c-section didn't go quite as planned. it was more like a 'K' section..."

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.