Aide Gifts

'But I'm not ready to retire!'

'I remember when I was high right-hand man.'

'Don't give up hope, Senator- We've worked out a plan to decrease your name recognition.'

'He doesn't pay his aides much, but he lets them loot.'

"Good news, Senator - consumer tips rates you as a 'best buy'."

"These dang-blasted gofer holes are a real nuisance, Zeke!"

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

In basket-case.

The president's men

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

"Morning, all!"

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

USAID Octopus Wrapping Around Globe

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

Good Luck!

That's What Happens

Shake it all about sign on desk

"Here's some of my work for you to do. It should be a refreshing change...for me."

'Fred's Office Supply? I'd like to order a dozen more desk bins and a step-ladder please.'

"Call my broker, fax my accountant, and get my groove back."

"Thank god you're early. It's a can of worms."

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

"Did you remember my mints?"

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

"....how many kids have we got now?"

InIn by-products.

"Do you have an appointment?"

A clerk asking for time off to get married.

In - Out - Pending.

Advances in Third World Healthcare

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

Not much money, glory, or praise

'My hot-shot assistant was named as one of the top 10 to watch."

"My assistant will show you the ropes."

'This 'infrastructure' stuff you keep talking about -- does it have anything to do with vegetables?'