Homework Wrangler Gifts

"I believe you, but next time your dog eats your homework, I'll want to see a stool sample."

"Dad, can you double-check my homework."

Storm in the out tray

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

"It's made entirely out of rejected resumes."

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

Trays on desk read, 'Here', 'There' and, 'Neither here nor there.'

Organization is not rocket science!

"I find it so stimulating to learn new software."

"I sincerely hope you learned a lesson this time, Mark. Drawing cartoons on your homework will get you nowhere in life."

'We'd like to form a support group for homework anxiety.'

'Your resume and interview were so bad, not only did you not get the job, I'm having you arrested as well.'

"You say you’re currently holding down 3 jobs...very impressive."

InIn by-products.

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

IRS Audits. That's your fourth "honest" mistake in a row!

'So, come back in fifteen minutes?...Twenty?'

"For this job, we require someone with excellent multi-taxing skills."

"After reviewing your resume, I don't think you should be teaching English - I think you should be study English."

"You'll have to find another excuse. The vet said I should remove salt, fat and homework from my diet."

"I know you used to be our paperboy. That's why when you leave, you'll find your resume on the roof."

"I plan on keeping this off my resume!"

'...the job is so much harder when you don't know what you are doing.'

Sue's job involved a certain amount of paperwork.

'No good deed goes unpunished around here.'

"I just Googled you and found out your resume is fake!"

Overwhelmed by Paperwork

In/Out.

'The secret of getting a good job that fits you perfectly is letting yourself in on what that really is!'

Homework Help and Homework Eaten Stands

'I can't remember the title,but it was on a little white piece of paper.'

"Okay, if that's all the finger pointing we have today, we can move on!"

"While your lesson plans were perfect, and your bulletin boards were terrific...your classroom management skills need work!"

'Excellent sir! Your signature is now completely illegible.'

'Ms. Grimmett, I sort of liked the old filing system...in the file cabinets.'