Homework Survivor Gifts

'Homework? Shouldn't you be telling us that you're a professional and that we shouldn't be trying this at home?'

"A catfish ate my homework."

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

'I didn't do my homework because I forgot my user name and password.'

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

Evil Exams!

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

'We'd like to form a support group for homework anxiety.'

'When played backwards these say terrible things like 'do your homework' and 'clean your room.''

"Teacher! What happens if we don't turn in our homework on time?"

'She finally made employee of the month but she paid the ultimate price.'

'I got a good place in my exams today. Right next to the radiator.'

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

"You'll have to find another excuse. The vet said I should remove salt, fat and homework from my diet."

Billy strip: help with homework.

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

"So this is it...the first day of the new school year. I guess studying, tests and report cards are still the hot things around here."

"That will be the gold standard by which all other naps are judged."

"We're a bit understaffed today, could you be 6 people?"

'The good news is we were able to remove the homework from his stomach. The bad news is, your kid can't write worth a damn.'

'English homework leaves a pleasant after taste. History takes like fast food. But math is a real bummer on my digestive tract.'

"There are 168 hours in as week and I work 184."

"He told me I was a flip phone expected to do a smart phone job."

'Word has it that you have an ulcer, Tomkins. Nice going! You'll find an extra 20 bucks in your paycheck.'

"Sure I know what it adds up to. It adds up to another 'C' for Eddie Goldbeck."

Homework Help and Homework Eaten Stands

'I've been doing well in school lately, so I think I'm entitled to some dumbing down.'

"I virtually finished my homework."

"You'll be pleased to know you haven't got any homework this evening."

'BEWARE OF DOG (eats homework)'

Hour Glass

"Dinner will be ready soon, so don't fill up on homework."