Holiday Humor Fan Pillows

"None opposed? Good -- then the motion is carried to double the workload."

'Bloody solar panels!'

"We love Santa, but Santa didn't know as much about investing as he thought he did."

'Baby on board.'

Insurance claim on Grandma

'The cattle are lowing...'

'Your resume is quite impressive, but we're looking for self-starters.'

Santa reading newspaper by the light of Rudolph's nose

Santa: 'Apparently, they found the personal details of hundreds of children on his computer.'

'One of my relatives is coming to Thanksgiving dinner...and one of yours.'

"It's bad enough when someone give you a card who you didn't... but worse when it's a musical card!"

"So, tell me of any experience you have that would make you well suited for the job.'

More proof that Christmas has become way too commercial.

'Are we the only two on the farm not looking forward to Christmas?'

"What do you know? We were mentioned in the recipe section of this publication."

Santa empties sack, sayng: 'The kids send very few letters since you set up that website.'

'This way! We will grant you sanctuary!'

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

SORRY,,, A creature was stirring,

Try me/try me/try me...

'I wonder what they wanted with rum this time of night?'

Only 12 more lopping days 'til Christmas.

'I won't forget honey, in fact I've got my eyes on some stocking-fillers as we speak.'

'Today, Santa Claus asked for a bail out.'

"Thank goodness no traffic jams for us."

Santa left stranded.

'Oops! I should've gone to the bathroom before I came.'

'Why do I have to get all painted up just because it's Easter?'

"Nice tree! Did you chew that one down yourself?"

"Santa's elves have to eat, you know."

"It's a time of peace, warmth, friendship! A time to think about...who is really important in your life....It saves you quite a few stamps!"

The Last Dinosaur

"Looks like an inside job."

Santa Text Exchange

"Off the record, I have to give all the credit to the parents. I'm just a figurehead."