Holiday Home Purchase Gifts

'The grass is plastic, too.'

'And if you look to your left between the condos and the ABD store, you can see the ocean.'

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Cut Price

Ice Cream And Summer Rentals

"So last Christmas it was those Cabbage Patch Kids."

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

"Here's to East, West, South and Bridgehampton, and all the little Hamptons in between."

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

"I love November - the crunch of leaves underfoot... the crisp air... the holiday markets..." "... it getting dark by mid-afternoon..." "Okay, that's less enjoyable."

"We balanced our budget this month!"

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

'C'mon! Speed it up! I've got a bottle of wine here that says it's meant to be drunk soon!'

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

Orderly Conduct of Sales

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

'We like to spend 51 weeks of the year at our Florida holiday home...'

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

Giant Sale!

Cars follow the sign to the mall rather than the sign to the manger.

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

Buy One Get One Free Sign Outside Shoe Shop

Woman crushed under satin sheets.

"Photo safaris are not what they used to be: They seem more interested in taking selfies than photos of us these days..."

Black Friday

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

That's my summer place.

"There's nothing like new carpeting to freshen up a place, I say."

"Rapunzel? She bought a time-share in Costa Rica. I'm Larry."

'And, as you can see, it is the perfect place to start a big family...'

Wait! It might be cheaper to just knock it down and build from scratch.

"I've been working on the household budget."

Seasonal shopping.