Hippy Lifestyles Gifts

"Bob's only attracted to lava lamps."

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

Wifi in Hell

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

Emergency Hipster Beard

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

Joined at the hipster.

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"Yuppies! There goes the hood!"

Your Guide to Winning Movember

Spontaneous Kombucha

Normal Beard vs. Hipster Beard

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

Peak Beard/High Peak Beard

Meticulously prepared, locally sourced food served on artifacts of a romanticized industrial past, by people who take their fashion cues from daguerreotypes, to adults whose parents still pay their rent.

The Organic

Upper East Side Dog Park

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

"Thousands of craft beers and I still haven't found one with a smooth, kibble finish."

Cat protests, with sign reading 'Legalise catnip!'.

"Wow, yours is already climbing your beard!"

"He's been like that ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

"Give me something that shows I'm hip AND fiscally responsible."

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

Can I get you another coffee?

Homing Beatnik

"Golly, bongos and espresso! You folks haven't changed a bit."

"It's actually an ink stain but my wife has grown quite fond of it."

Brooklyn.

"Your father and I were hoping for something a little less artisanal."

"It's nothing new. We've always offered a complimentary beard wash following an order of ribs."