Hippy Lifestyles Pillows

"Bob's only attracted to lava lamps."

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

Emergency Hipster Beard

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

"Yuppies! There goes the hood!"

Your Guide to Winning Movember

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

Spontaneous Kombucha

"You'll find that as a restaurateur I've worked hard to showcase the finest in organic and free range ingredients that have been harvested and prepared in authentic and traditional ways."

Peak Beard/High Peak Beard

Upper East Side Dog Park

The Organic

Meticulously prepared, locally sourced food served on artifacts of a romanticized industrial past, by people who take their fashion cues from daguerreotypes, to adults whose parents still pay their rent.

"Thousands of craft beers and I still haven't found one with a smooth, kibble finish."

Cat protests, with sign reading 'Legalise catnip!'.

"Give me something that shows I'm hip AND fiscally responsible."

"Wow, yours is already climbing your beard!"

"He's been like that ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

"I'd like a fat-free, gluten-free, MSG-free, mini, super-skinny, artisan latte please..."

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

Can I get you another coffee?

Homing Beatnik

"Golly, bongos and espresso! You folks haven't changed a bit."

"Something a little different this time or would sir care to look like a dick again?"

"Your father and I were hoping for something a little less artisanal."

"A messenger from the West Side, Your Highness."

"It's actually an ink stain but my wife has grown quite fond of it."