High-flyer Humor Gifts

'Ah, Reeves - it's lonely on top!'

Pilot with champagne.

Private Jet

"We are now boarding priority travellers. Please be ready to present an air of entitlement."

Missing you.

"Welcome to Trapeze Talent Inc. If you'd like us to catch you, fill out this form, and we'll get back to you if we're interested."

'Could you throw me the car keys?'

'Not only am I a frequent flyer, I'm a frequent waiter.'

'There can be such a thing as too much parental involvement.'

For Sale: Red Arrow

'The reason I'm paid fifty times more is because I think I'm worth it.'

"It's the part about 60 take-offs and 54 landings that worries us."

'Wow! That's got to be some sort of record!'

"I always end up next to the weirdo!"

'This is your passenger speaking. Where the hell is my coffee?!'

'The stock market closed early today due to an outbreak of 'altitude sickness'.'

"We'll begin boarding our first-class passengers after a ten-minute pause in honor of the even wealthier people who fly in private jets."

'Shall I box up the shoes, or does your son want to fly them home?'

'Come on! You only live once!'

Skydive

'Co-pilot to pilot - I've located why the plane is out of balance.'

'Your $5 gets your 3 minutes in the lavatory--now how much toilet paper would you like to purchase?'

"You think you're annoyed? The acoustics in here are terrible!"

'Except for that, how did the experimental plane perform?'

Flying carpets.

Trapeze artists.

'Hi, I'm a sky marshall, you?'

The only thing I have to offer is my own confusion."

"O.K., Mr. Spinelli, you're up. Now bank her to the right, and I'll talk you back in for a nice smooth landing."

Man flying above the clouds

"I hardly fly anymore. The emotional baggage fees were killing me."

'Next time the captain says to turn off your cell phone, just do it!'

"With our lives it's all abut the journey. With our luggage, it's definitely about the destination."

"We seem to be out of gas. I'm outa here! See you on the ground."

Extreme Skydiving