High-altitude Guru T-Shirts

'Becoming enlightened fifteen minutes before I did doesn't EITHER give you seniority!'

Apples for sale

Due to his low center of gravity, Jake is the greatesr broncbuster ever!

Intelligent people laugh too!

'But what is the universe for?'

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

'Atomic Ski Bum' An extreme skier is showing off!

'Hey! What's the big idea!?!'

"Bonk!"

"Yes, if that towel weighs 25 lbs that would explain the reading."

Newton's Cradle Solar System

'Oh, yeah? -- Well, my true inner self can whip your true inner self!'

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

His and Hers Gravity Bars.

The earlier, less publicized discovery of gravity by Corblatt.

The sad fate of Isaac Newton's Tahitian counterpart.

"Remember, it's the journey not the destination."

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of insurance forms.

Trying to describe the size of the Big Bang.

A not-so-happy God, with the Humans, sticking an Eviction Notice to the Earth

"I hear you've got friends in high places...?"

"Galileo, I've had about enough of all your gravity experiments!"

'So much for Newton. Now, as for Einstein...'

"Galileo soon modified his gravity experiments" "Ready to catch it?"

'And so thanks to my dad's waistline I now understand the theory of our constantly expanding universe!'

'Astronomy I, Astronomy II, Astronomy III'

"Bear in mind there are three laws in this gym we cannot ignore: health, safety and gravity."

Newton discovers anti-gravity,

Man read's Newton's 'Philosophiae Naturalis Principa Mathematica' and says: 'Blimey Isaac, this is, er, pretty heavy stuff.'

If Sir Issac Newton and William Tell were brothers, gravity would never have been discovered.

Descendant of Galileo disproving the theory that computers double in speed every twelve months.

Galileo's Attempt to discover is heavier dog falls faster than lighter dog.

'How did my Chinese ancestors keep from falling off the earth before Mr Newton invented gravity?'

Friends often dropped by and subjected Sir Isaac to a little good-natured ridicule.

Dad Planet: 'Hey you KIDS! I thought i said no ORBITING in the house!'