Higgs Boson Hunter Gifts

Spot the Higgs boson competition (like 'spot the ball' competitions).

The Kitchen area of a Whitechapel Boarding House

"Whose idea was it to start with the Hallelujah chorus?"

Bottle Distillery

Ghost puddle

'What does coincide mean?' 'It's what you do when it starts to rain.'

'Aloha! On behalf of the tourist board may I thank you for visiting our remote and mysterious island - Have a nice day!'

Astrological forecasts of the rich and famous

Commonly confused homonyms: Frigate and Frigate

"Matt, you look like you just saw a ghost who fired you!"

You know, Lars, you really should ask the waiter for a whine list. If it weren't for the fact that I can see the spelling in your word balloon, that insult would have gone right over my head.

"Here's a blues number I wrote after hat shopping the other day."

When you said you were going to find your ancestors I thought you meant on the INTERNET!

'We discovered a massive dust and gas cloud which is either the beginning of a new star of just a hell of a lot of dust and gas.'

Spot the Higgs Boson competition

'Hon, come quick! I think we have a major computer bug.'

"Can DNA testing really prove that George Washington was the 'Father if our Country'?"

'It's not supposed to be a triple helix, is it?'

"Your Fitbit isn't working?"

Genealogy Service. Family Trees Traced. I discovered that not only are you heir to an unclaimed family fortune, but I'm your long lost brother Wally!

After spending months researching his family tree, Mr Henshaw could think of little else.

'Hold still, Phil, there's a bug on your hat.'

'Sue, the poltergeist has made us another cake.'

'Ferguson always was an overachiever.'

Misheard egg orders: Scrabbled, Poked, Freed.

"Are you serious? C'mon...you're pulling my chain."

'And tomorrow. . . the darkness will pass and all will be bathed in a celestial light that will unify and transform mankind. . .'

GENEALOGY - FAMILY TREE RESEARCH, 'Whoa! -- John Wilkes Booth AND Benedict Arnold?'

Man at Medical Waste conference says - 'Hello?'

"You can't just work all the time, you need to find a hobby..."

Sting. Madonna.

Sadie, I just heard they discovered lots of ancient cities buried hundred of years ago in the jungles of Cambodia. They've each got weird geometric patterns outlining what may have been gardens. But now one really knows what they were used for. I guess what I'm asking you is ... what were they used for? Y'know, since you were there to see them in their prime. They were used for ritual sacrifices of dullards. For educational purposes, I shall now perform one.

"Since Gerald discovered he had 5% Viking DNA he insists on fitting in a bit of pillaging before tea."

Hazards ALWAYS exist!...

'Looks almost humanoid.'