Heavenly Baseball Enthusiasts Gifts

'Homer!'

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

Vendor selling testosterone.

Angel doing the hula hoop.

Psychiatrist to man dressed in baseball jersey: 'You've never gotten over the fact your father wouldn't play catch with you?'

'Talk to my lawyer.'

'Catch a pair of chimps and do a complete makeover on them.'

Ahhh, spring baseball.

"He just married me on the rebound."

As senior assistant groundskeeper, Louie was responsible for dragging the infielders before every game.

'Remember that summer we coached little league?'

'Yo, Danny! The pitcher's complaining about the crowd noise. Turn it down!'

'Yes, Haffner appears to be tiring...'

Nasa finally runs out of ideas for missions.

A angel wearing a helmet poised to throw a football down from heaven.

'... So one day I thought, hey, why walk all the way out to the mound just to take a pitcher out of the game?'

'Free food. Free place to sleep. And now we get to see a Cubs game - all comp! This is the freakin' life, Louie!'

MLB Owners, Players, Fans

'It'll take a day or two to get the parts. Meanwhile, here's a loaner.'

The whole "lasts longer" thing isn't really necessary here in eternity.

Third base coaches during a brawl.

Football Angel

"If you can get his parents to go ballistic, he can't hit a thing."

'Remember his weakness is a pulled tendon, so keep it as high as your bursitis will let you, but take it easy with your fast ball because of my bone chips.'

'Wait! I'm an attorney and I represent the base runner!'

"Whoa! Now Philly has the bases loaded with one out!..."

No hit field mouse. 'I got it!'

Who should have been nominated to baseball's hall of fame 2013...

'Your halo didn't slip. You've got ring around the collar.'

"Up here, we call it 'Nectar of the Gods' not 'Devil's Brew'!"

A pitcher is stranded on the mound.

"It looks like everything is made out of memory foam these days."

Letter to God

'I think maybe they should move opening day until it's warmer.'

Tickets. Game Today. Football is not the same up here. Buying a ticket from a scalper won't get you in --- You have to see Saint Peter to get through the gate. Need Ticket. The players literally fly around the field. And all penalties are forgiven. Are there any similarities to the game on earth? Yeah. When the officials review a close play, it takes an eternity!