Heat Humorist Gifts

'At least it's a dry heat'

'No wonder it's so warm! Someone's been messing with the thermostat again!'

"Well, at least it's a dry heat."

Hell's fan...

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

Global Warmer 2000.

Shaved Ice

"Oh, you know - wearing light clothing, drinking plenty of liquids, and avoiding strenuous activity."

'Now that's what I call rejection.'

Portrait sweating above a fireplace

Titanic iceberg auction

'Your left ventricle doesn't know what your right ventricle is doing.'

Indian summer.

"It's so warm that I'm laying hard boiled eggs."

'My boss collects stupid hats, Is yours for sale?'

Another thing is that it's really cool in the summer!

Emergency Room: 'Quick! Get some ice on this injury.'

'I swear it wasn't this cold before they invented the wind chill factor.'

"It was the hottest earth day since records began."

Intense summer sun

How You Know It's Spring...

Hades Weather Channel. Tomorrow will continue gloomy with lots of scattered firestorms and high pressure fronts. And, as always, an infinitesimal chance of freezing over.

"These desert mirages are virtually like being at the beach."

'Don't they look silly?'

"It's the worst summer I've ever known."

Steak Lovers.

Do not feed the bears. But you can contribute to our Kickstarter fund.

'Jill, come take a look at Mr. Bolinder's EKG!'

Lukewarm, lukecool and lukeHOT.

Gatorade!

Global Forecasting Institute

"You think we like these extra playoff rounds?"

Environmental Clues

'Is this the way to the beach?'

Vine-Gripened Tomatoes