Headmistress Gifts

'Anyone can get to school on time if he tries hard enough, Eddie.'

'I tell you, dad, Miss Hamilton is a witch!'

'I know you're on drugs boy. You've been seen with the supply teacher.'

'When do you teach them how to dress themselves?'

The unexpected breaking up of the seminary for young ladies

"The head will see you now."

'It's hard to believe that at home, she's a mommy.'

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'

'42 day detentions will of course only be used in exceptional circumstances.'

"Don't take your job so seriously, Mrs. Butler. Life is so short."

'What zip code are we in now?'

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

Yummy Mummies

'Don't be so dramatic and get into my office!'

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

'146 days of leadership without any negative press.'

'Long term I want student achievement to increase. Short time I want a cup of coffee and a biscotti.'

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

'We're the parents. What we say goes. . . In one ear and out the other.'

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

'Coulda, woulda, and definitely shoulda.'

A new schoolmaster testing students on geography

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

'Yes I think we did go to school together. Wasn't you the old headmistress?'

"This may take a minute as my mom's menu options have changed."

"I'm number 846 on my salon's wait list. You?"

'You can't blame the kids for being restless when we have math teachers teaching French, and English teachers teaching science.'

'Here you are. I got tired of making you endless cups of tea..!'

"Your spelling, grammar and typography are all dreadful... Do you really want to end up as a cartoonist when you're older..??

"We are now in 'The Galley,' where flight attendants scavenge for food, hoard magazines, hide from passengers and over share details of their personal lives."

Education Guidance

Principal: You are here, and you should be ashamed of yourself.