Headmistresses Gifts

'Yes I think we did go to school together. Wasn't you the old headmistress?'

"You're not allowed to plead 'no contest'."

'What zip code are we in now?'

'And this year's 'Inquisitive Learner Award' goes to...'

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

'As I walk through the halls, I see teachers teaching and students learning and I say to myself, 'what wonderful school, what a wonderful world.''

Yummy Mummies

'Don't be so dramatic and get into my office!'

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

'146 days of leadership without any negative press.'

'Long term I want student achievement to increase. Short time I want a cup of coffee and a biscotti.'

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

'I tell you, dad, Miss Hamilton is a witch!'

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

Education Guidance

'Here you are. I got tired of making you endless cups of tea..!'

"Your spelling, grammar and typography are all dreadful... Do you really want to end up as a cartoonist when you're older..??

"We are now in 'The Galley,' where flight attendants scavenge for food, hoard magazines, hide from passengers and over share details of their personal lives."

"This may take a minute as my mom's menu options have changed."

"I'm number 846 on my salon's wait list. You?"

'You can't blame the kids for being restless when we have math teachers teaching French, and English teachers teaching science.'

Principal: You are here, and you should be ashamed of yourself.

'I'd love to play house, Kevin, but I've got a business to run.'

'I know the kids don't like you and pick on you, but you have to go to school...you're the teacher.'

'Well if you're sick of seeing me here, and I'm sick of coming in here,let's call a truce!'

A restaurant with a "Main Dining Room" and a "Room for Dessert".

"I think Bev is taking this social distancing thing a little too far."

"Smoking or nonsmoking?"

'Our Monday night '90-off wine night' isn't exactly working wonders for Tuesday thru Saturday.'

'She's attending a 'confidence empowerment' seminar, to have her aura recharged.'

"Every sixth grade substitute is offered an optional cyanide pill."

Kate's first task as new principal was to right a number of wrongs.

"You know, we've given this same bottle back and forth to each other for so long that it's probably pretty good by now."