Hangry Humor Pillows

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"States of tofu"

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"My guess it's guacamole."

"Dare I ask for mustard?"

A man and his baby are wearing bibs with images of what they are eating.

Deliboys

"You're looking a bit RUFF this morning."

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

"Dad fixed you a balanced breakfast - the runny eggs are balanced with burnt toast!"

Sisyphus Sawyer

"I'll have the vegetable lasagne, hold the vegetables."

'Well you asked for Al dente.'

"The chef made some substitutions to tonight's menu. Instead of Escarots a la Bourguignonne, he's cooking hot dogs."

"It's choux pastry, not shoe pastry!"

"I like my steak well done."

'It was at this point that I insisted all employees eat their vegetables.'

'It's beans OR toast, not beans ON toast.'

Preserved

"That's just great! Enough with the public displays of affection!"

'I made your favorite -- dinosaurkraut!'

"That's a toaster. It's a tanning bed for bread."

"Hallelujah!"

Stay at home food pyramid

'Not yet! Wait until he hits the breaking point... we just gave him some warm, soft bread and the cold, hard butter... THEN we bring out the flimsy plastic knife.'

"What would you serve with toast?"

"You confused the Sudso box with the Cruncho box."

"Chicken on a bend of spinach and onions?"

'What's your thumb doing on my steak?' 'Want me to drop it again?'