Thirst For Humor Pillows

'Poland springs! Poland springs!'

'You lifted your head.'

"Freud doesn't work for you, so I', going to try some Dr. Anthony Fauci..."

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

Man sitting on bank with pulling up fishing with sign from fish attached to hook: Gone fishin'.

And overcoming their resistance by sheer skill.

'You will never require the services of a dating agency.'

'He did it for us.'

"You know very well what fish!"

Fairy tales reimagined for the 21st century. Jack and the Beanstalk

"Wow. I just had a near life experience!"

I don't care if you hate that word – I'm hangry.

"200,000 other people have also highlighted this passage of the E-book, you common idiot."

"Wait, you mean to tell me they sometimes catch and then don't release?"

Cow can

'Your heart is slightly larger but that's because you're an animal lover.'

'It was rumoured Henshott's father had been involved in certain genetic and biological cross-breeding experiments...''

Menace.

"I know that house was right here last Halloween."

'I just had to come over...You caught my eye.'

"Stay back. I don't know what he's got, but I'm afraid it's catching."

Snowman: 'Maybe we should put down a towel first..?'

"Ooooohhh, now that's what I call a piercing."

Woodpecker sitting on snowmans nose

'We've got the neighbours from hell.'

Cat barking.

'You go ahead. I just don't feel like drinking this afternoon ...'

"I wanted to keep my summer look, so I got it colored."

Big Bird

"Rats, they've not been shorn! We can't eat sheep today, the wool makes my throat itchy..."

"....I never feel truly alive until someone sticks their hand up my butt."

'Brilliant! I love it! I'll give you ?25,000!'

'Would you like the correct time and temperature with your transaction?'

Tommy, I have a question for you. I didn't do nothin'. We're missing a scone. Now, no one's accusing you of anything. I swear, you've got the wrong guy. I definitely didn't take a scone when you went to check email because I was super hungry. You have the right to remain silent. I did it!

'You remember earlier when kevin said there was nothing to eat.'