Add a dash of humor and comfort to any space with pillows that showcase clever wit and creative charm. Great for lounging or decorating with personality.
Tommy, I have a question for you. I didn't do nothin'. We're missing a scone. Now, no one's accusing you of anything. I swear, you've got the wrong guy. I definitely didn't take a scone when you went to check email because I was super hungry. You have the right to remain silent. I did it!
'You remember earlier when kevin said there was nothing to eat.'
As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'
"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."
Honest Vending
'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'
"Fresh pepper spray?"
"Bottled, tap or toilet water?"
"Just so I’m understanding the menu, the ‘Old Forge wheel with rosemary-infused pancetta’ is essentially a $36 Hot Pocket?"
Do-it-yourself sushi bar serves live fish to customer.
"The finger bowl is courtesy of the gentleman."
'Our chickens are a real 'come back' story: raised organic, they hooked up with some seedy fowl, but then, thankfully, were saved by massive doses of antibiotics.'
'Lets all thank Martha for her very innovative 'Hot Dog Crepes'.'
'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'
The End of the World is postponed from 2000 to 2112.
Supermarket Warehouse. At night, with just security here, the products sing classic karaoke. The orange juice is belting Elvis'"All Shook Up." Peanut butter and jelly performed a duet of "Love Will Keep Us Together." children's breakfast cereal sang "Sugar, Sugar." And sriracha sauce did a rendition of "Great Balls of Fire"! What song will the ground beef choose? Jimmy Buffett's "Cheeseburger in Paradise," of course!
What makes the flies in your soup "artisanal"? I know, right? Personally, I think it's just a lot of hype perpetrated by the flies. Menu.
Shakespeare Ave
"You're in luck. A slot for you just opened up in our kitchen."
'In case of emergency, break glass.'
AS about Today's Specials' - 'Whatever didn't sell yesterday.'
'I'd like to order, please.' - 'Okay, what's your table number?' - 'I don't know.' - 'Find it, weak-minded fool!!' - 'What's our table number?' - 'There is no table number.' - 'There is no table number.' - 'You should have been assigned a table number whe
'I just come here for the ambiance. The food's lousy, so ordered a pizza be delivered.'
'Hundreds of years of medical progress, and all you can tell me to do is eat less?'
Haute Cuisine Meets Low Couture
Menu. Everything looks so delicious! Thank you!
There's a strange mist over my food. You never heard of pea soup fog?
"I feel like I can't trust myself around food."
'Too much information! I prefer not knowing my lobster's name was Sigmund.'
Guru Shifted Thinking
"How about you? Were you 'locally raised'?"
'No, I don't have a favorite. Dung is dung.'
"In addition to the menu, we have a few specials on the board."
'I'll have the frogs legs - and make sure they're kneeling.'
The mushroom pickers
Explore our collection of funny mugs that celebrate the humorist spirit—perfect for starting each day with a smile.
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