Handwriting Detective Gifts

'I've got my handwriting back from the graphologist - she says I'm shoddy, untidy, and cack-handed - it's uncanny!'

'These are by my doctor. If my pharmacist can't read his prescriptions, how can I expect to read his tasting notes?'

"Of course it's a stupid sign, but you wouldn't believe how much money it brings in for city hall!"

"I believe it was called 'cursive'."

"I DO have a note from my doctor...but nobody can read it!"

Pyramid Handicap Parking

Man in office, desk covered in computer equipment, uses floor for photos, desk pads etc.

"You'll never make it as a doctor with handwriting like this. I understood every word."

Letter writing lady.

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'Don't you think it's time you did something about the draught in here?'

In trays read: Bluff/Blink.

"Miss Jenkins, e-mail the housekeeper. Her telecommuting days are over"

Jean, bring me everything we've got on gravity.

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

"If you put little crosses on your sevens people will think you're French."

'The $39.95 is for the prescription, sir, and the $7 surcharge is a little something for our handwriting expert.'

'Miscellaneous' and 'Non-Miscellaneous' trays

'Stewart, why is the handwriting on your mom's last two attendance notes different?'

'I can't remember the title,but it was on a little white piece of paper.'

"Where would we BE without the right DOCUMENTATION...?"

'Excellent sir! Your signature is now completely illegible.'

'I'm at that awkward age when I can't read my own handwriting. Do they teach penmanship in college?'

"Is it my imagination, or does our use of correction fluid increase as people's teeth get whiter?"

Files of Doom

"We need to talk about procrastination."

"Yeah, the Declaration of Independence is beautiful! What font is that?"

'Does this pen come in another font?

'You can read, right? -- I want you to check this thing for loopholes.'

The Sleep of Reason Produces Bureaucracy

Man convinced by a flattering character sketch

"This app encrypts verbal communications. My doctor's handwriting is all we need to encrypt everything else."

"I noticed he had punched air holes in his desk. Now I'm afraid to open it."

"You forgot to read the small print Mr Burrows. My charges are ten pounds a letter and you have two hundred and thirty three on this page."

'Did you think that since so few people now use a manual typewriter, I wouldn't notice that you'd typed your penmanship homework?'