Hammer Humorist Gifts

'I got an F today - for improper interfacing with my computer.'

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

Football Chameleon

Mouse in a hamster wheel.

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

"Let's try for dignified yet playful, while maintaining the spirit of preservation."

Not you. Your hair.

"I’ve heard of them barking at the moon, but never scatting at the sun."

'Does this thing get channel four.'

Ed's receding hairline!

'...And, from what I understand, they don't have any hard drive at all.'

Lawyer to bad hair lady: 'It's difficult to establish pain and suffering based on a bad hair day.'

'Nothing like being your own boss, huh?'

Book: 'From prey to predator in 30 days.'

'Well, I think it's very creative of the dog to make a wig from his shed hair.'

"Are you sure this is a 'Flu virus?" "See for yourself...it's nose is running!"

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

Bald Man Overcomb

"In your 40s, hair starts growing everywhere except where it should."

'He's wearing a toupee.'

"We've been victorious in many battles, and yet helmet hair remains our fiercest foe."

'Just a trim for me thanks.'

'I have way too much respect and dignity to dye the grey out of my hair... so instead could you all just put on these brown-tinted glasses.'

"Hallelujah!"

Murphy bed...Murphy.

'And so, Ladies and Germs, I conclude that we must promote homeopathy! This may be our best chance to wipe out the human race since the glory days of the Black Plague.'

'My boss collects stupid hats, Is yours for sale?'

''Just face it - you're going bald.'

Bobo's Barber Shop

"Can you suggest something that will enhance my hairstyle?"

Toupee in a tin.

I'm a bolt, dummy! Does everything look like a nail to you?!

Visual gag (the real Mona Lisa behind the scenes).

'My 434 novels are very similar to Terry Pratchetts apart from the fact that they've never been published.'

"His baldness was way out of control, so we had to put him into a medically induced comb-over."