Gutter Guard Gifts

'Jim, it's the doctor. You didn't hear him right! He said you need to improve your bowel movements...not make bowling improvement.'

"He likes it."

'Now that's an afro!'

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

Night-shift entrance

"Boy, the kids are growing up so fast!"

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

Mr. Blok goes bowling.

Bowling ball van driving into bowling pin factory.

Bowling ball head.

You thought YOU hated YOUR job?

Dentist Training School.

"We like to think he's experimenting with color and form, but his art therapist suggested we're not giving him enough candy."

"We've given it a great deal of thought and we decided we're going to give in to everything you want at all times."

'The king wants a gesture, not a jester.'

'I fell out of my treestand but fortunately nothing got hurt.'

'Why should I look forward to the weekend? Rake leaves, clean out the gutters, mend the fence, wash the car...'

Bashful Royal Guard

Contagious Diseases.

Press spy infiltrates Buckingham palace dressed as a guard.

Mouse shopping after hours

'I suppose technically you're right. But we still prefer not to think of it as a gated community.'

'Thank goodness you got here in time. Frank was going to start without you.'

"If the stock market goes to infinity, would we be able to pay off the national debt?"

"Am I rusting? I think one of my sections is sinking. Oh, no! I thought I heard the gate squeak."

'The neighbors called to complain about your armor squeaking again.'

"He's allergic to peanuts, sensitive to wheat, lactose-intolerant, and just plain weirded out by fruit."

"I may be a newt, but I'm still King -- find that witch!"

I work all day landscaping. I'm too tired to do all the yard work at home. Teddy, you're big enough to use my power tools. I know exactly who to call for help. Tap tap tap. Not the power tool I was referring to.

"Try not to loft the ball so much.'

Soldier With Mouse Ears.

'Isn't it great Darling: The kids are now old enough to have dinner ready when we get home...'

"Are you sure this is in your job description?"

Dignity and Impudence.

'What do you mean give the boy a house key? He'll lose it, learn how to break in despite our sophisticated security system and be on his way to a life of crime.'